my hero.

Amber Rose intrigues me. I don’t know much about her, but what I do know is that shes a stripper from the Bronx.As I am..(minus the stripper part though) Up until last year she was still dancing.... Cut to a hop, skip, and a jump:Kanye takes notice of her while shooting a music video where they hit it off, they now date. Somewhere along this time-frame, she caught the eye of Ford Models and is now a proud member of this prestigious agency...Kinda blows my mind. From stripper, to professional model. Amber is my new inspiration.

People can say what they want, but look where her individualism got her. My only advice: Keep it classy. Remember ,you represent FORD now…….

YUMMY

A LITTLE AFTERNOON EYE CANDY.

My Next Tattoo

I read this passage on pickthebrain.com, and it made me cry. I cried alllll night.
This quote moved me so much! “ No matter how long it takes and how beaten you may feel, you must try and try again.” My life hasn’t been easy. No matter how many times my ambitions are misunderstood, minimized, or discredited, I can never stop. I’m a fucking star! I always thought that, and this quote got me thinking. I ‘m debating whether to put it on my rib cage, or underneath my left arm.
Best wishes,
Danielle.

should I be pissed off about this?

So I had a little rendezvous with a friend. She recently lost her virginity- we're both 22 mind you. She's all excited, and it's awesome. I think she texted me saying," I HAVE SOMETHING TO TELL YOU." Instantly, I figured that shit out. "You fucked him?" cool=)

AT 22, this isn't something I agonize over. I'm a virgin. A fucking virgin. And to be honest, my life is pretty difficult for many reasons i wish to omitt in this blog. My mindset centers around finding someone who will love me. Not necessarily getting my cherry popped. Having said that, I'm human just like everyone else. I'm not immune to insecurity. Sometimes I DO feel a little pressure.

Cut to: Driving to caiao's house, my buddy's talking about sex. She's like "So whats the furthest you've been with a guy?" "HAVE YOU DONE X, Y, OR Z?" No," i said. Some contextual info: I'm chillen enjoying my life, the music im listening to, and she keeps tlking about sex. Though I'm being supportive, im like, losing your v- card isn't a big deal. Like, who cares at 22?

I'm kind of beyond the "oooh pleaase just fuck me stage." My life is heavy,I've got more serious shit going on,not just worrying about how far i cant get with some dude just so i can say i fucked. Im perfectly fine satisfying myself when i got "the urge."' Lol

oh, and to top it off-this bitch is trying to give me sex advice in vain. And at this point Im totally rolling my eyes.... Can you blame me?

Ever notice how black guys never use the word "Cock?".......I'm just saying. Discuss.

Boozing with the fam? YES. Fucked up Nails? Unfortunately Yes

My last remaining horas in the Bronx was awesome. It consisted of the following: getting tipsy with my aunt at a bar in weschester. meeting an awesome dj - then having him stalk me later, missing my damn train and being semi-stranded in CT until i decided, " this is an golden opportunity to get my nails did." Can't say im not efficient! Anywho, the dude doing my nails was a chill-ass Asian, and we hit it off. Only, he left me with ghetto-rific nails.. I'm still dealing with the end result, but I'll live... pics up soon

hauling out the old

I'm changing some stuff up, letme know what you think!

-thanks.

Coco.

Back to The Boogie Down

I'm in the BX- my home town, and I can't help but think how bourgeoisie I've become. Well It's not that I was never the "white chick," but being in co-op reminds me of how much i dont fit in-esp after living in the burbs for six years. Imagine me, with my kahki pants and mayonaise sandwiches trying to assimilate into "the hood." Well, as close to the hood as Danbury dwellers would view it. Think Jimmy Jazz stores, miserable minorites, and ghetto chinese spots!

Wow reminiscing brings me back to what I missed in the first place. Can you say bittersweet?

kisses,

Danielle M.

and she's just gorgeous

And I could do this too.

This post is probably best read from the bottom up. Just filling you in cuz i love you!

life goals. i feel like i could really do this.

There are so many things i want for myself. I figure that visualizing my goals will help me achieve them better. Within due time, I wanna be a makeup artist, eat healthier, improve my self esteem, and I wanna travel. Today I also learned I wanna go to England and teach english as a foreign language.

I'm moving.. and I dont know how to articulate this?

I'm moving into my sister's smaller room, and I'm so excited! I don't remember how to write so, many of my posts are going to be bullshit. It's just a matter of me revving up my "engine," so to speak. Eventually they will get better.... Fingers crossed!

Company of Thieves :Oscar wilde

I'm obsessed with these guys...they're kinda melodic with a 70's feel good vibe..

sad hairy monkey

Ya'll im sad as fuck. My lazer hair removal funds have run low despite my frugal ways! ugh.. Plus no one will hire me cause im only home during spring break...(they're horrible lol) despite this im am keeping my head high, and spending low.lol so far i've raised more than half, but im in the hole about 45 bucks! Anyone feel a calling of philantrophy?LMAO I'll keep you guys posted on my evolution.

MISS AMANDA BLANK

CURRENTLY LISTENING TO: MISS AMANDA BLANK (above)

She's sexy.fun. and crazy, bitch..If you don't know, get acquainted.

MORE WHERE THAT CAME FROM!

PARTY !

WE had so much fun..."male bashing" AMAL calls it. WE usually get so messed up it never gets to that though... its more of a get fucked up outing?

played? not so much.. Learne'd. yes

so i hit up that dude. he played me. he told me that he never really even like me, that he stopped liking me after he found out i was a virgin..and that he thought i was crazy, and clingy..WOW. yes, my feelings are kind of hurt. and to top it off, he said "but ya know we could still be cool though." Really? as tho i want his charity. I am a bit hurt and im going to keep it real, today.

he said he thought i was crazy imagining wen we were hanging out- we were on dates.

first off, we had been flirting via, text, and it was snowing- hes all asking if I want to get snowed in with him etc.... and i was like nah, but u wanna grab a bite... to me that was kind of datish- b/c i was liking him flirty with him, and he reciprocated, so any outing we did during this period wouldnt be 100 percent platonic. Plus we are on a college campus with no cars/money..its not uncommon to go out on a "date" and not actually go out n go all crazy spending money..In fact our first official date was dinner at the dining hall.. so yea, im sry if we were flirty w/ each other and were eating at the d hall and i thought it was a date? was i that damn off?

Also, i feel like in sum ways he lead me on, hittin me up on fb- every time im online, and for valentines day saying oh u have plans but wen ur with him, u'll be thinkin of me! lol wtf..

What I learned: Basically I got to clingy/desperate.. I liked him, he was a 10 for me...I never get 10s if I get hit on- at all, so I really wanted this to work.

2nd. He would hit me up online, but wud hardly acknowledge me in public. I should 've known right there! I guess i knew he wasnt really into me- but ignored it b/c then he wud IM me, and be all flirty and so forth, what have u.

3rd. the fun part... He lead me on.. If u never really liked me, why are u flirting with me?? To feed ur ego? and saying things like insinuating that u want to come over, etc?? and if i asked u wat u feel about me, why not just say "i think ur cool, i def see u as a friend!" etc... "not i think ur cool... wanna come over?"

I ignored the obvious signs, and accepting his mixed signals(maybe he validated himself with my feelings idk) and yea i feel a lil stupid, cause having anyone think ur clingy/ crazy is never flattering... plus wat hes prolly told his frens about me...but u know what?

I shudnt think of it that way Im a funny,caring,sensitive, and honest girl im not afraid to get real with any of my feelings- i think theres sum maturity to that..... and any guy who only wants JUST the physical in this stage of my life is gona miss out on me..... pluss, I learned never to put all my eggs in one basket.. NEVER ignore the signs presented to u, and what else! always be myself-never caring wat people have to think about me, and of course always shoot for tens!!!!

EVERY DATing encounter, or "tlking" experience, is in turn just a learning experience!!!! It makes u more savvy as a person, and u grow into the awesome person u are!

cheers,

danielle.

bat for lashes

how beautiful.

frat party. a recap of my day

Trinity college has frat houses that somewhat resemble the type from "OLD SCHOOL" which, of course was awesome.

there was no beer bong: which I hate.

I felt ugly when I went un-courted until I met a lovely Indian man with a bachelors in engineering, from dartmouth. I tried to like him. His body was hard, built, and wide..BUT, i just wasn't feeling him.

My BFF kimbo, got so blitzed that she tried to jump out of our speeding car, danced on a bar, n peed in public- in her Greek attire( shes in a sorority)

Sweet jump-off Nicolas hit me up at 4 in the morning, seemingly interested in me again.

(and above is a pic is a Brooke Nipar pic)

One fantasy I've been thinking about is to date both a man and a woman at the same time. Like a triple date. Seems interesting enough. Maybe I'll keep you guys posted on this one.



Love,



Your ever so stunning mistress



Danielle

I Want Him Back

Nick, oh dear Nick. I'm obsessed with you. Marry me... Finger me...

Poop.

I ordered a Leg Magic, waited two weeks, and it doesn't work. Shit on me.

Poop.

I have all these feelings building inside of me, yet when i type them or wish to type them, I'm grappling for the feelings and text that kept me up all night.

I partied last night: i didnt really get approached to much.. I guess some days r my day. some days r not.....Im also feeling as though Pretty boys are not for me.. They know they're cute, all the girls are breaking their necks, and bending over to dance with them. When you do try your luck with one of these dudes, they either have no personality, cause they never had to try... OR. they think your lame because your not acting all V.I.P. you get me? I'll have the semi-cute, not steryotypically good looking guy any day.. If he had the personality to back it up.

Shakespeare: My shakespearean class sucked ass. I didnt really do the reading.. bUt in my defense it was day two, i just got my book, and he never told us what to read up to. So WTH. yeah, it was classic embarassment . My professor has us stand up, and tell the class about a portion of the story and dissect it and shit. Whereas im up there mumbling and bumbing.... it hurt so bad.

1.22.09

Out of hiding.

What have I've been up to?
Vacationing? ....stressing about the rising costs of textbooks. I called my mom very discouraged today, ready to quit school because this is ridiculous... Anywho my posts are probably going to be lackluster, and boring, because as of now my life is boring, and tad depressing. I dont even care.

-Danielle